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British Television.

Dear British television.
I’ve tried, I’ve really tried. But you have no place in my life.
Since a young age you have tried to be a part of my life with your Dr. Who and your Some Mothers Do Have ’em.
But I’m afraid it’s come to the point when I have to tell you, I want you to leave me alone.
You’re not funny, There I’ve said it. Sure, sometimes you get a sympathy laugh but that’s not enough for me to want you in life.

I know you’re trying so hard to make my laugh, I can see it, but you can’t. I find myself just staring at the screen wondering why all those people in the audience are laughing. Then I remember that it’s not an audience, It’s a recording of an audience that is on cue to show ME it’s a joke and when to laugh.

But on top of that…Could you be any more boring?
Seriously, It seems that all you can do is shit crime shows that have absolutely no action or a point, or fucking shows that should have no place on TV…Antiques Road show…Fucking seriously? Who watches this? House auction shows and renovation shows WTF? are these meant to make me want to buy a house in England? because they don’t.
Maybe you should clear up the sky and make it nice an sunny, Then maybe.

Look, British TV you seem like a really nice person and I’m sure if you change yourself completely you will make someone really happy one day…but that person is not me.

Stop…just stop.

Yours sincerely
Rookie Allen